By Sulome Anderson
BEIRUT: When Lama found her children, aged 5 and 7, touching themselves in a sexual way, her first reaction was to give them a slap and tell them that wasn’t appropriate behavior. “I asked my son, ‘How could you do something like that?’ ” says Lama. “
‘Who does that to you?’ He started telling me that his dad does that to him … and the same for the girl. I saw her doing the same thing and at first I hit her then asked her, ‘Who does this to you?’ and she said, ‘Dad.’” Lama, whose name has been changed to protect anonymity, a pale woman in her 40s wearing a hijab, says she immediately went to her husband and questioned him.
“When I talked to their father, he denied it,” she says. “He said … it was impossible that he would do something like that. He hit the children and said they were lying and coming between us … He said if they came to me to complain about their dad I should hit them because it’s all lies.”
After watching a television program about child sexual abuse, Lama says she realized what was happening to her children.
“The last time it happened, he beat the girl up and told me I should punish her if she says something like that … and if I didn’t do it he would divorce me,” she says. “I understood after he exerted that much pressure on us that it was true [he had molested them].”
Child welfare professionals say that child sexual abuse is a growing problem in Lebanon. A 2008 study conducted by KAFA (Enough Violence and Exploitation), an NGO that works with victims of sexual abuse, in collaboration with Save the Children Sweden, found that 16.1 percent of children surveyed were victims of some form of sexual abuse.
Dr. Jinan Usta, a general practitioner with the American University of Beirut Medical Center and one of the doctors who worked on the study, says that she is convinced the actual percentage of children being sexually abused is even higher. “I still believe that the level of prevalence is higher than 16.1 percent,” says Usta. “Many of these cases go unreported.”
Mira Faddoul, a social worker with KAFA, says cases go unreported because child sexual abuse is still a taboo issue in Lebanon. “A lot of people don’t like to talk about it because of the way society looks at this topic,” she says. “Often they blame the child. And when a child tells someone their story and no one believes it, that makes the trauma even worse.”
Faddoul warns that sexual abuse usually takes place within the same household or community. “A lot of people think that abusers are always strangers, but our study shows that most abusers are from the same home or community as the children they abuse,” she says.
According to Alessia Chiocchetti, Lebanon Child Protection Program adviser for Save the Children Sweden, as a result of the social taboo surrounding the issue, cases of sexual abuse involving children don’t often see the inside of a courtroom. “Cases of children being abused are usually dealt with within the family, because there is a stigma,” she says. “Children who have been abused cannot live within the community in the same way as children who have not been abused, especially the girls.”
Chiocchetti says that another problem facing victims of child sexual abuse in Lebanon is the lack of governmental services geared toward preventing cases of child abuse and providing follow-up care for victims. “There should be proper follow-up procedures and psycho-social services,” she says. “Families should refer cases to specialized organizations and institutions. However, this is also lacking, so it’s very difficult.”
Law number 422 of the Lebanese penal code, which was ratified in 2002, designates UPEL (The Association for the Protection of Juveniles in Lebanon) as the only governmental organization mandated to deal with reports of sexual abuse and pursue the abuser. According to Chiocchetti, although much progress has been achieved over the last few years, the legal process still needs a lot of work.
“According to the legal framework, cases of child sexual abuse should be reported to UPEL,” she says. “This is the only organization that is mandated by the government to provide social and judicial protection to children at risk. However, you need a lot of skilled human resources to accomplish this, and that is not the case at the moment.”
Rachelle Raad, a social worker with UPEL, admits that the process of removing a child from danger is not as fast as it should be, but she maintains that this is a result of problems with communication between UPEL and the courts.
“The process is slow not because of UPEL, but the legal process unfortunately takes a long time,” she says.
“When the case is very urgent, the judge acts immediately. But it usually takes a long time with most cases. We do what we can to expedite the process,” she adds.
Jermaine Frem, a social worker with Dar al-Amal, another NGO that works with victims of child sexual abuse, says that another problem facing victims in Lebanon is the lack of shelters in which to place abused children.
“The problem is finding a specialized center to put these children,” she says. “There is no foster care system in Lebanon … They go to orphanages usually. There is the Bon Pasteur Center, which is specialized, but it is the only one. You can’t have only one such shelter for an entire country.”
Asked about warning signs that parents should look out for, Usta says that although some children don’t display any symptoms, others can experience a range of different health and psychological problems.
“They will have a lot of psychosomatic symptoms … some have headaches, abdominal pain, things like that,” says Usta.
“Some of them may develop what we call secondary neuroses – they start bedwetting again. Some of them have changes in their behavior, so they may become withdrawn, cry easily or become aggressive. They develop problems in school, problems sleeping or nightmares. I always tell mothers that when there is a sudden change in the behavior of their child, they should take notice.”
Lama nervously twists her hands in her lap as she talks.
“The [judicial] procedures are going very slowly and I feel there is neglect of the issue,” she says. “Children cannot bear such mistakes. Any day he could walk into their schools and take them, even now.”
The mother shakes her head and looks at the floor.
“There are women here who I’ve talked to,” she says. “I’ve heard their stories … I’m becoming shocked. It’s as if you’re living in a world that’s very different from the one outside.”
BEIRUT: When Lama found her children, aged 5 and 7, touching themselves in a sexual way, her first reaction was to give them a slap and tell them that wasn’t appropriate behavior. “I asked my son, ‘How could you do something like that?’ ” says Lama. “
‘Who does that to you?’ He started telling me that his dad does that to him … and the same for the girl. I saw her doing the same thing and at first I hit her then asked her, ‘Who does this to you?’ and she said, ‘Dad.’” Lama, whose name has been changed to protect anonymity, a pale woman in her 40s wearing a hijab, says she immediately went to her husband and questioned him.
“When I talked to their father, he denied it,” she says. “He said … it was impossible that he would do something like that. He hit the children and said they were lying and coming between us … He said if they came to me to complain about their dad I should hit them because it’s all lies.”
After watching a television program about child sexual abuse, Lama says she realized what was happening to her children.
“The last time it happened, he beat the girl up and told me I should punish her if she says something like that … and if I didn’t do it he would divorce me,” she says. “I understood after he exerted that much pressure on us that it was true [he had molested them].”
Child welfare professionals say that child sexual abuse is a growing problem in Lebanon. A 2008 study conducted by KAFA (Enough Violence and Exploitation), an NGO that works with victims of sexual abuse, in collaboration with Save the Children Sweden, found that 16.1 percent of children surveyed were victims of some form of sexual abuse.
Dr. Jinan Usta, a general practitioner with the American University of Beirut Medical Center and one of the doctors who worked on the study, says that she is convinced the actual percentage of children being sexually abused is even higher. “I still believe that the level of prevalence is higher than 16.1 percent,” says Usta. “Many of these cases go unreported.”
Mira Faddoul, a social worker with KAFA, says cases go unreported because child sexual abuse is still a taboo issue in Lebanon. “A lot of people don’t like to talk about it because of the way society looks at this topic,” she says. “Often they blame the child. And when a child tells someone their story and no one believes it, that makes the trauma even worse.”
Faddoul warns that sexual abuse usually takes place within the same household or community. “A lot of people think that abusers are always strangers, but our study shows that most abusers are from the same home or community as the children they abuse,” she says.
According to Alessia Chiocchetti, Lebanon Child Protection Program adviser for Save the Children Sweden, as a result of the social taboo surrounding the issue, cases of sexual abuse involving children don’t often see the inside of a courtroom. “Cases of children being abused are usually dealt with within the family, because there is a stigma,” she says. “Children who have been abused cannot live within the community in the same way as children who have not been abused, especially the girls.”
Chiocchetti says that another problem facing victims of child sexual abuse in Lebanon is the lack of governmental services geared toward preventing cases of child abuse and providing follow-up care for victims. “There should be proper follow-up procedures and psycho-social services,” she says. “Families should refer cases to specialized organizations and institutions. However, this is also lacking, so it’s very difficult.”
Law number 422 of the Lebanese penal code, which was ratified in 2002, designates UPEL (The Association for the Protection of Juveniles in Lebanon) as the only governmental organization mandated to deal with reports of sexual abuse and pursue the abuser. According to Chiocchetti, although much progress has been achieved over the last few years, the legal process still needs a lot of work.
“According to the legal framework, cases of child sexual abuse should be reported to UPEL,” she says. “This is the only organization that is mandated by the government to provide social and judicial protection to children at risk. However, you need a lot of skilled human resources to accomplish this, and that is not the case at the moment.”
Rachelle Raad, a social worker with UPEL, admits that the process of removing a child from danger is not as fast as it should be, but she maintains that this is a result of problems with communication between UPEL and the courts.
“The process is slow not because of UPEL, but the legal process unfortunately takes a long time,” she says.
“When the case is very urgent, the judge acts immediately. But it usually takes a long time with most cases. We do what we can to expedite the process,” she adds.
Jermaine Frem, a social worker with Dar al-Amal, another NGO that works with victims of child sexual abuse, says that another problem facing victims in Lebanon is the lack of shelters in which to place abused children.
“The problem is finding a specialized center to put these children,” she says. “There is no foster care system in Lebanon … They go to orphanages usually. There is the Bon Pasteur Center, which is specialized, but it is the only one. You can’t have only one such shelter for an entire country.”
Asked about warning signs that parents should look out for, Usta says that although some children don’t display any symptoms, others can experience a range of different health and psychological problems.
“They will have a lot of psychosomatic symptoms … some have headaches, abdominal pain, things like that,” says Usta.
“Some of them may develop what we call secondary neuroses – they start bedwetting again. Some of them have changes in their behavior, so they may become withdrawn, cry easily or become aggressive. They develop problems in school, problems sleeping or nightmares. I always tell mothers that when there is a sudden change in the behavior of their child, they should take notice.”
Lama nervously twists her hands in her lap as she talks.
“The [judicial] procedures are going very slowly and I feel there is neglect of the issue,” she says. “Children cannot bear such mistakes. Any day he could walk into their schools and take them, even now.”
The mother shakes her head and looks at the floor.
“There are women here who I’ve talked to,” she says. “I’ve heard their stories … I’m becoming shocked. It’s as if you’re living in a world that’s very different from the one outside.”
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